For those of you who don't know Mario Testino, let me introduce you. He is a Peruvian fashion photographer. He has shot for Vogue, V, Gucci and Vanity Fair.
His most famous subjects have included Lady Diana and her sons, Kate Moss, Madonna any many, many others. Any women living today would kill to be photographed by him. Including me. For those of you who know me, that comment must come as a shock. But in fact, I often dream of being photographed by him. Let's face it, this man can do so much more then any plastic surgeon could ever hope to do.
Throughout my life I have been photographed often, and usually without consent. There was never an event or vacation without my father sporting his camera. My brother Nick was always clicking away when you least expected him. Inevitably capturing us at our worst, and then holding the pictures for ransom. Payment was usually in the form of washing and ironing his clothes. Then came those strange boys from school, who always managed to pull a camera out of their jackets when I was rushing to my next class. They really irked me. I was like... guys I know you're not working on the year book!
What is it with men and their cameras anyway? Okay, men are visual. And...? Does that mean they have a problem with their long term visual abilities or something? Is that why a man's camera is the next best thing to his...TV? I mean, come on fellas, what gives? Don't you have more then enough magazines, and internet sites to quench your need for the "visual"?
I, for one, want to adopt the position of the Native American Indian. They believed that having your picture taken steals your soul. Well, I say to all you soul-less people out there - I'm not letting you snatch mine away again. It's taken me a long time to find it, restore it, and hold on to it. It's mine and you can't have it!
Except you Mario, click away baby, my soul is yours for the asking.
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